Skip to main content

Pressure to be Perfect

There's so much noise about stress everywhere. People are constantly complaining, grumbling, some taking it seriously and doing something about it or some proudly flaunting it because it's a sign to show that they're busy. OK. Enough said.

My question is - is the primary cause of all this stress because of an immense pressure to be perfect in everything we do?

Take parenting, for e.g. Have we created a myth of having to be perfect parents? Let's see - you have to help kids with their homework so that they get their straight 'A's, chaperone them to music and dance classes, sports, extra math, involve in the school PTAs, setup playdates, read to them everyday (wee ones) and the list goes on. Even as an adult, these tasks are so daunting. I don't even want to think about the kids who have to do all the above - with perfection. Well, they have to, right??

Then, comes the onus of being a dutiful son/daughter to your parents, caring sibling, affectionate spouse, successful corporate worker, wonderful student, exemplary teacher, good neighbor, responsible citizen - you get the idea.

All of the above is not something new. We homo sapiens have been at this for centuries. But, in the recent years, is there an element to excel that's the culprit behind our stressful lives? Why do we have a burning desire to be good at everything we do? It's great to have high standards, but what is the cost here? Is being a less-perfectionist that big a deal? Are we willing to set the bar a little lower for ourselves so that we can create room for some harmony?

Well, i am not ready yet. How about you?

Popular posts from this blog

Minding the language...

So, the ability to use language as a mode of communication is one of the main differentiating factor between us and the rest of our primate friends. It gives us that crucial "one-up" to dominate the earthly scene, making us feel all superior. Of course, we easily gloss over the fact that some of us can share so many other traits with the animal kingdom - don't we have enough samples of sly foxes, wise owls, slimy weasels, scared chickens, sharp eagles, vain peacocks etc all around us? Makes one raise an important, poignant question: are we so different after all? Me thinks nah, not so much. More on this topic, it's also fascinating that there are around 3000-6000 languages spoken by us humans around the world (as per our friend "Wise Wiki"). In India, even if you're linguistically-challenged like me, there should be an average of at least two languages acquired over a life time by each person (this is my own extrapolation, so please don't ana...

Human Needs and Relationships......Part 2

continued from part 1..... Let's start from the bottom of Maslow's pyramid, which is Physiological & Safety needs . These are our basic survival ones like eating, breathing, clothing and, living under a decent roof. The human mind will come to grinding stop if these are not met, and you'll be unable to even think about the next level of needs. Don't believe me? Try dieting/fasting for a day, and you'll be amazed how your fat brain (please, it's a compliment) which used to process complicated thoughts like the greenhouse effect, looming elections, world economy etc. till the day before, can obsessively think of only one thing and nothing else now, which would be the magical, four-letter manna - FOOD. Anyways, these needs would probably come from the closest relationship of all, i.e. parents or caregivers. And, from an evolution point of view, would be our Infant/Childhood stage. Next, is the Love/Belonging needs, which deals with our sense of ...

You and your compass....

Let's talk about what each and every one of us have within ourselves. That deep, down voice that tells us strongly what to do, not to do, what we ought to do but choose not to and regret later on with a "I-told-me-so", things that we wish to do but dare not try in our lifetime....you get the drift. Yes, it is that all-pervading, metaphorical inner compass, or the SatNavs of our lives that I'm getting into. Young adults  think they have an independent mind, and do and act that way. In reality, though, in most of the cases, it's not even of their own choice, but out of peer pressure. Which interestingly, brings a point- whose collective, mob voice is it then? If everyone is busy copying someone else doing the same, then who the heck started the fire? No clue, but let's assume for sanity's sake that some life form starts a trend which gets viral, bacterial, whatever. And, suddenly there's a strong urge that compels every youngster to do it ...